Yet we go about chasing our so-called dreams...

An old lady in a wheelchair held up a can for a donation for some organization. I pretended to look away, tried to avoid eye contact. I quickly darted my way across the road, walked hurriedly because of what, I didn’t know. I was in a hurry. I was in a hurry, so I looked the other way. I was in a hurry, so I couldn’t even spare some change.

When was the last time we cared about something other than our own comfort? We go about hurriedly in life, chasing after our so-called dreams of money, cars, hot girls, good skin, Chanel bags, alcohol and parties. When was the last time we did something that was not for ourselves? When was the last time we looked a homeless person in the eyes and told them the truth that we do not have money in our pockets but that we have a party to go to, a new phone to buy, a new handbag on hold and because of that we can’t give them anything?

Yet we go on about our lives, looking at what people we barely even know will put up as a status on Facebook. And watch religiously every night to find out what scandal the rich and famous have gotten into.

Yet we go about everyday chasing our so-called dreams.

Sad thing is, you and I, and pretty much everyone else will most likely forget about this.

"The thing about the rat race is, even if you win, you’re still a rat."

Beijing Club -- the secret gay club for men who don't even know they're gay

Yes, that’s the club I went to on Friday night. I always want to go clubbing but each time I go, I’m reminded that I actually hate clubbing. Beijing club is probably the worst club I’ve been to. Don’t believe me? Here….let me paint you a picture.

I walk in the club, I mean I CAN’T walk past the door because there is already a sea of men. Yes, just MEN. I’m standing there trying to make my way through and already there’s a dude who whispers in my ear, “I have a table over there, come and drink with me.” Eww…maybe a better line first? All I could see were men, men and more men. Every guy was stuck onto another guy. With no space to breathe, let alone dance, all the guys just look like one big swaying mass. I wonder what the guys feel like. Having another man right up your butt, your chest, your arms are touching, your legs are touching. You might as well be in a gay porn production.

With no women in sight, and an entry fee of 300 HKD for men … I wondered why so many guys flock here every night, every week. There aren’t any girls!

So I concluded that Beijing club is actually a gay bar for men who don’t know they’re gay (yet) but love dancing 0.5 mm away from 20 other men. Yay for them.

I’m going home.

i love eavesdropping!!

Yes you read it right. I love to eavesdrop. As socially unacceptable and immoral it is, sometimes I just cannot help but listen to other people’s private (well, semi-private) conversations. The thing is, sometimes, I’m FORCED to hear these stranger’s talking. Take dinner time. In Hong Kong, the tables in restaurants are so packed that I can hardly squeeze my ass through the gap. Now how is it possible NOT to hear what the next table is talking about??

I’d like you to meet my friend, Mike. Well, he isn’t really my friend because technically we never met officially. But I do know a great deal about him because I heard pretty much his whole life story in the frame of 2 hours. Yep. You guessed right, he sat at the table next to mine.

** To my friends whom I have dinner with : it’s not that what you say isn’t interesting. I still love you guys.

Okay, back to Mike. So Mike is 30. He’s a banker. (Didn’t make a great first impression on me! HAHA Those who know me will know how I dislike people who love money and work solely for money. I’m sure there are a few bankers who love the environment and poor people, but for now, I dislike bankers. lol.) Anyways, he’s going through a divorce right now and his wife wants to take his apartment and the dog. Oh the dog!! He misses the dog dearly but is too scared of his ex-wife to go visit his dog. And now he’s dating a girl who is a friend of his ex-wife. WTF?! Stop right there. I wanted to slam my drink down on the table and yell at him, “DUDE! You NEVER go for the ex-wife’s friends!” I thought it was a rule carved into stone, no? Anyways, he’s going through what he described as depression. Well, I’m sure I would be depressed if I’m dating my ex-wife’s friend whilst my ex-wife is fighting for my apartment and kidnapped my dog.

So yes, I do love to eavesdrop. Do you? Or are you boring and stick to conventional rules and think that eavesdropping is rude and socially unacceptable? hehe….

shopping haul!

I found out about a neat local organic farmer’s market near where I live!! Finally! Living in whoop-whoop land has it’s payoffs! But that’s soon to change (maybe?) I’m being kicked out of my apartment and will need to move. Being super busy lately, I will probably have to move into my ever accommodating bf’s apartment. Thank you for taking me in. My friends laugh and say he should be saying thank you instead because he now has a free maid. Ahh, things always have two sides .. ANYWAYS, back to my blog topic. Shopping. Yes I went shopping, but for FOOD. aha, I’m sorry but shopping for food makes me happier than buying clothes. I told my friend the other day how I haven’t been shopping in ages and her response both shocked and offended me a little even though I guess she’s right. She simply said, I know, I can tell. OUCH.

Well, here’s my ORGANIC haul for the day! And I had this bottle of organic wine in my treasured cabinet and I whipped it out because it just seemed to go perfectly together.

Here’s what I got: 

- Eggplants

- Cherry tomatoes

- Onions

WINE~~ This is my first time trying organic wine. But it’s from Barossa valley, South Australia and I love South Aussie wine, so I figured it was a no-fail wine. And it is good. Mm…

And here is my pasta dish in the making. First, I sauteed some garlic in olive oil and then added the eggplants. I added a bit of wine so that the eggplants won’t taste so bland. Cover and simmer for about 5 minutes or until soft. Then I added the onions and cherry tomatoes. Season with basil, parsley, black pepper and some salt. Finally, toss the drained pasta back into the pan and drizzle a bit more olive oil. Then I added just a little bit more wine (as you can probably tell, I am a wine fanatic).

And here’s the final product. Top with a little more basil and cracked pepper. Delicious never seemed so easy!!

Enjoy! 

xo

jam.

meditation...or just enjoying life?

Meditation usually makes me think of a bald bronze-painted monk sitting cross-legged with a huge sword strapped to his back and a few leaves whirling in the wind. Anyways, it’s almost too un-real for me. But as I learn more about mindfulness and meditation, I realize that it isn’t so mystical and … well, boring.

There are people who do sit cross-legged and try not to think, i.e. empty their minds. But there are also many ways you can achieve that inner peace. If you can’t sit for so long (like me), then there’s walking meditation. You focus on walking and on the present moment and nothing else.

I like to think that there are many activities we do that helps us to achieve that inner peace. For example, I like to run. When I run, my mind blanks out and I just focus on my breathing. Well, I’m a terrible runner nonetheless but it makes me feel good. I am oddly one of those people who prefer a treadmill over outdoors - solely because I always get lost or run into bikers and all that. Treadmill is just hassle free and I know I won’t fall (treadmills usually won’t have holes that suddenly appear) so I can just run and not care about anything else. And I don’t have to stop for traffic lights. On a side note - how is it that some girls can run so beautifully and gracefully and…bouncily a la Bay Watch? And me, I run so awkward you’d think I was running with my arms instead. *sigh*

Cooking is another type of meditation for me. I love to cook and I love the whole process of going to the markets and deciding what I want and choosing the freshest ingredients. I love chopping up vegetables and the smell of garlic and olive oil. And I love having a glass of wine whilst I cook. It relaxes me.

There are about a million things one could do to clear one’s mind and focus on one’s well-being. What kind of things do you do to make yourself calmer and more peaceful?

The End of Poverty?

A truly astounding documentary. Please do take some time to watch it. It talks about how poverty begun and why it is so difficult to end. It really does make you re-think your whole attitude to government, fair trade, charity and life in general!

The thing that struck me most was the idea of “agrowth” as a parallel to “atheism”; where “agrowth” refers to the exiting of the religion of economic, removing the religion of growth. Rather, to de-grow and reduce waste, reduce over-utilization of natural resources, reduce work, and in turn, rediscover other aspects of life.

xx jam.

what I do in my free time.

This is what I have been doing since I’ve recovered from my illness —

It is not what I should be doing (i.e. assignments). The fact that these assignments are due in 10 days and the fact that I am nowhere near does not stop me from ignoring them. Hello? First day you’ve known me?

So this is what I’ve been doing instead:

1. Nike Training app — pretty awesome as I’m too lazy to go to the gym if nobody is willing to drive me there. Ha…which is pretty much nobody. All I have to do is roll out my yoga mat and I can exercise! There may be pretty girl videos but these workouts sure kick ass. (Well, they’re definitely kicking mine!)

2. Learning how to Dougie. Yes, this is what I do. Don’t judge me. If you have no idea what I’m talking about….you seriously need to get with the times! Y’all been living under a rock or what? Watch this…

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/v/aZglqkCRNt8]

3. Figuring out why black people make everything seem cooler and way better. I saw a black guy wear skinny jeans and was not repulsed by it. Odd……….

4. As I was learning how to dougie, I discovered its near relative…the Cat Daddy. Oh yea…bring it on.

5. Making blueberry smoothies with my Magic Bullet. I love that super tiny blender!! Blend away…blend away!!

on a more serious note...

It is very painful to watch the news these days. The horrendous famine happening in the Horn of Africa. The terrible fighting and bombing in the middle East. The violence that is inflicted on civilians.

I do wish there was something I could do to help. Last night, I prayed for all the children who are starving. For all the people who died fighting for what they deeply believe in.

And today, I’ve decided to not eat meat for a month. This is to remind me of how fortunate I am. In doing so, I expect to save a bit of money (especially on groceries) and donate all my “meat-money” to help the famine in Africa.

Acts of charity are usually for the giver to feel better about themselves and their fortunate lives. And I agree. I give money, I donate and give up something. Then I can watch the news and hear about the dying and think, “Well, I did something to help.”

But is this an altruistic act or a selfish act?

just a number? think again...

Did you know that when presented with details of one individual’s suffering, we feel more empathy and sympathy than when given the details of a group of individuals’ suffering. Doesn’t sound rational? Think again. Think about all the most striking campaigns you have watched on TV.

Take anti-smoking campaigns for example. What do you remember most? That lady who was dying of lung cancer and had to breathe through a hole in her throat when her children are still under 10 years old and she had to explain to them why she was dying? Or the number of people who die from smoking-related diseases every year in the world?

Our brain works in such a weird and fascinating way. Humans are often criticized for not employing logics of reason. Yet, we also criticize artificial intelligence and machines that act on such logic and reasoning and mathematics. Fascinating, isn’t it?

Experiments have shown that when people are given information about one starving child in Africa and asked to donate money, the average amount is $11. Yet when given information about the statistics of dying children in Eastern Africa, the average amount that people are willing to donate drops down to $5.

(taken from this awesome blog — Adventures in Existence)

Question: can we ever be fully rational and ignore emotions? Maybe that’s the difference between AI and the human brain…

can't i just be peter pan?

One of my favourite fairy tales is Peter Pan (no, it is NOT snow white…wipe that smug look off your face, You-know-who-you-are).
Adulthood sucks. Every teenager wants to grow up quicker because they want “freedom”. Well, this so-called freedom is actually very limited. It should be renamed, “you-can-do-whatever-you-want-as-long-as-you-have-money-and-time”. Bleh!

The other day I was thinking how one year ago, I had just arrived in HK and stressing over finding a place to live and setting up a bank account (that was hard because I didn’t have proof of address….and I couldn’t rent because I didn’t have income proof….ahh, vicious cycles). And how time went by so quickly! And then I find out that my landlady wants the apartment back….I begged and she gave me a couple more months. But still!! I gotta PACK??!! Why does life keep shoving up the things I hate the most? Packing?? Damn…….the horrors of Korea comes flashing back. I left so much stuff in there I might as well just carried empty boxes away. It still remains a mystery how that could have happened.

Gah…. who wants to pack for me? Where’s my mother???!

is organic really better?

Lately I’ve been into all things organic. My hair was falling out and looking more like chewed up and regurgitated hay than real hair. I changed to an organic shampoo and not only does it smell nice, it looks shiny too. My skin was getting allergic reactions to all sorts of creams and I changed to an organic and natural face products and I *think* it works. I try to buy fresh foods (the organic produce are WAY too pricey). Heck, I even bought organic WINE!

I was always skeptical of such claims of the benefit of going organic. I always thought, dude, we eat chemicals, bathe in chemicals, walk around in and breathe in chemicals all day long. And we’re fine.

 But I see my grandparents and parents having illness and things like high blood pressure and diabetes and cholesterol - which, apparently *everybody* has. And I myself had a bit of health scare and the doctor said I’m not healthy enough. WHAT?! That came as a shock because health is something a lot of us take for granted. Well, I definitely did.

I decided that I am at high risk of developing all these things too. So I want to be healthy. I am making a conscious choice to live better and to eat better. And I’m not saying that organic is necessarily better, but it does make me feel better that I am eating and using more natural ingredients.

Although, sometimes I do think the whole organic ordeal is really a conspiracy. I mean, it seems that there are less regulations on organic produce than normal (cheaper) produce. But then again, all the produce I buy is probably from China. I’m screwed either way.

But I think, organic or not, the best way is to cook at home! I’ve been scouting around for really simple, delicious and nutritious recipes. Maybe next time I can share some of that with you guys.

I don’t want to work so hard only to have something keep me from enjoying my life when I’m 50!!

i'm back (yay!...not really)

I’m back from my mini-vacay and seriously, it’s hurting. Well yea, the aussie dollar was WAY too strong when I was over there and that did hurt. And the day I arrive back in HK, the news lady told me that the economy is crashing and the aussie dollar has gone down a bit. That hurt too. But what hurts most, is the fact that … I’m not in the Land of Oz anymore. No more sleep-ins till 1pm and then roll out of bed and walk across the street for some fabulous brunch. No more sitting at outdoor cafes sipping lattes and watching beautiful people in amazing outfits walk by (I swear the milk tastes better over there, and I swear the same clothes look better over there. It’s like miracle land). No more rolling around in my tiny town house but thinking it is magnificently HUGE. No more getting dressed up and wearing heels and NOT HAVING TO WALK because I can drive. No more eating dinners for 3 hours and still not getting kicked out. No more desserts and wonderful coffee. Oh have I mentioned the coffee?? Now all I have left is Starbucks. Ew. They should not be allowed to use the name “coffee” for whatever it is that they’re serving. EWW.

Wow. What an angry and depressing post. Don’t worry. I’ve been feeling a little ill since I been back which makes this whole post-holiday blues even worse.

PS. Can someone just “develop” airsickness? I never used to get air sick but these recent flights have got me throwing up every 10 minutes. Good thing my seat was by the aisle and close to the toilets. Bleh.

k. bye.