Suicide Awareness post

Today was a beautiful day. I stood out on the balcony in the morning, feeling the salty sea breeze. What a beautiful day, I thought.

I looked down, 20 floors beneath me. And I thought of people who felt so empty and hopeless that they would jump off. I tried to imagine their torment, their despair. Thinking that death was their only relief. 

I don’t know if today is World Suicide Awareness Day, but I think everyday should be one. 

I’m trying to put together a powerpoint talk on suicide prevention for teenagers - as I’m doing research, I stumbled upon a pretty gruesome website that documents photos of suicides and freak accidents. A man who’s head was split open and his body turned almost inside out and his organs were lying one feet away from him - suicide by jumping off a building. A young man sitting in a tub with only half of his head remaining and the other half splattered over the bathroom tiles nestling a shotgun in his laps - suicide by shooting himself. 

I am not a fan of anything gruesome and I absolutely dislike gore and blood. But it really pains me that these people felt they had no choice but to commit suicide. 

Suicide is preventable. So, whoever is reading this, be kind today. Be kind to strangers, be kind to your colleagues, to your children, to your spouse, to your parents, to anonymous people on the internet. And maybe, someone may find hope again. 

technology fail

Technological advances have been absolutely amazing and I hate to say this, but I definitely feel lost and awkward without my phone. But at the same time, it has been infringing on my freedom and personal boundaries.

A Good Example: What’sapp.

There have been times when I needed to give out my mobile number for work-related issues. And suddenly, clients and students and all sorts of people start whatsapp-ing me. It never really bothered me until one day, I somehow clicked into my profile. Oh dear. I had totally forgotten that I’d put up this stupid photo as my profile pic -

Oh dear. It was a joke and now even my banker knows I’m an arrogant prick. Yea, and it’s also weird looking at the whatsapp names/profiles/statuses of people who have a professional relationship with you. Anyways, so this parent was whatsapp-ing me about his kid who’s my student and… let’s just say I’m slightly embarrassed in the least.

Like Charlie Brown would say, “Good grief!”

fernweh

You know those annoying ice-breaker games where you have to describe yourself in 3 words. Well, I think just this one word will do. 

Now, I just need to work on making it into an adjective. Fernweh-ish. Fernweh-able. Hmm…

too good to be true?

I have never been a fan of getting a manicure. The thought of it is nice — pamper yourself, get someone else to do your nails, pick fancy colours and have someone paint it perfectly.

However, my experiences with manicures have never been as good as my fantasy. For some odd reason, I always get hurt. Yes, either they accidentally snip off to much skin and cause me to bleed a little. Or they scrape too hard underneath my nails and cause me a great deal of pain. Either way, I always cringe about manicures.

When my mum came to visit me in HK, she took me to this “awesome place” which turned out to be a nail salon. Anyways, I went in with a skeptic heart. My mum raved on about this great new polish that doesn’t chip or break for weeks — and they’re not fake nails. Hmm…keep going, I’m interested. So I found out it’s Shellac, which is the new craze in the nail industry.

So I try it. What they do is apply a thick coat of polish and then you stick your hands inside this UV light box for 2 minutes. And then they repeat until you get these impeccably shiny polished nails. And your nails dried almost instantly. No chips, no breaks, super shiny.

Wow. I’m impressed. Sound too good to be true?

Well, the sad fact of life is that when things sound too good to be true, they usually are.

What had happened was that a day later, I noticed that my hands got tanner than the rest of me. Awkward. I thought, did my fingers get tanned from the UV light box?? So I checked my mum’s hands and damn, they were looking rather farmer-ish.

So yes, it was definitely too good to be true. I don’t want to be having any cancer fingers** on top of having farmer hands (albeit with nice nails)…

** you can click on that link for an article about UV manicures and cancer.

Photographs of Johannesburg

Photos from a recent short trip to Johannesburg, South Africa. 

Aluminium.

Branched.

Distant herd.

In the middle of nowhere.

Postcard worthy.

All eyes on me.

Cocky.

All belongs to me.

Camouflaged. 

An angry bull.

Back away. That’s right.

Man selling newspaper.

Cute lion cubs.

Calling. 

Resting cheetah.

Snack booth.

Yet another postcard.

One more.

Does my bum look fat?

My favourite shot.

A tour guide. 

The gatekeeper.

Faraway hippos.

Giraffe carcass.

Animals by the waterfront.

Dusk.

For more holiday photos, click here :)

The Dark Knight Rises...stupidly, I would say

I’m supposed to be having an exam on Saturday. But hey, I needed a break and so I went to watch Batman at the local theatre. I’d heard all the rave and all the hype and was actually pretty excited to watch it. You see, I’m generally not a big Batman fan…mostly because Christian Bale has a terribly stupid voice when he changes into Batman-uniform. But this movie proved more dumb than the previous ones - don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed it. I quite liked it. It was very entertaining and the graphics and effects were awesome. Catwoman was sexy. Hell, everyone in the movie was good looking. Especially Joseph Gordon-Levitt (eye-candy definitely).

BUT…here are 10 things I found incredibly stupid about the movie, The Dark Knight Rises:

1) Apart from Batman’s fake-Darth Vader voice; we now have another WTF voice from BANE. It sounds like Bane actually had a mic attached to his mouth guard, because there was no way his voice could be that loud and clear. And he had some crazy accent from god-knows-where.

2) Batman is crippled and what have you, and then he goes up to a pretty thief who doesn’t exactly seem trustworthy and says, “Take me to Bane” and expects her to fight evil with him and not bail out. I guess you cannot be rich, good-looking, AND smart. Oh and Batman just decided to leave all his gadgets at home so Bane could break his back, literally. Speaking about his back….

3) That brings me the next point. Batman gets his back broken and thrown into some unknown prison and he healed himself within 5 months—> no, not like saved his nerves and was able to feel his toes again. No, Batman became fitter than ever and even fixed his crippled leg just by HANGING himself on some ropes. Now kids, don’t try that at home, it’s still advisable to go to the hospital first.

4) And there’s more to this rant. What the hell is that prison? This crazy prison that allows people unlimited tries to escape —> and after you’ve failed to escape, there is actually someone there who nurtures you back to health SO YOU CAN TRY AGAIN! And in this crazy ancient land, you actually get to watch the local Gotham news channel! Woot! How convenient for Batman to keep up to date.

5) By some sort of miracle, Batman manages to escape. With his newly healed broken vertebrae (which was sticking out and some man smacked it back in) and his healed leg (I’m pretty sure Bane removed his leg “brace”) and new determination, Batman manages to make that jump and into freedom.

6) Batman is in some ancient land where nobody knew where it was…but he managed to get back into the city of Gotham. Good job hitchhiking! Oh and remember, Gotham was “locked down” and nobody could enter or leave? And I’m pretty sure Bane did not conveniently leave a passport or driver’s license with Batman after he broke his back.

7) There is 12 hours left before the bomb detonates in the city of Gotham. Meanwhile, Batman is playing with gasoline and drawing his logo onto some wall … just so he can look cool??

8) The part where Bane hijacks the stock market and bankrupts Batman. It’s acknowledged as a fraud but yet, nothing can be done to restore his assets? Oh and the board of directors blame Batman saying it’s his fault? Maybe Wayne Enterprise needs to change their directors and replace them with some smarter people.

9) You’d think an atomic bomb would need to be handled with care. Nope, not this one. Everyone was just trashing it around in trucks, lugging it around, and heaving it like a volleyball. Oh and batman was swinging it left right when he hauled it up with his plane. It’s like, “as long as the countdown doesn’t reach zero…it’s NOT going to detonate! Don’t worry!”

10) There actually isn’t a ten, but I just thought 10 would make a more complete list, as opposed to 9, or 8. Well, for the sake of it being 10, let’s add one more. The prison doctor kept speaking in a different language and another man had to translate for him. But in a later scene when Batman and the doctor were alone in the dark, the doctor actually spoke English. Huh?

Here’s a little comic I drew especially for Batman:

All in all, this was a good movie. It just had a few things that didn’t really make sense. But I guess it’s a comic-book turned movie made by Nolan starring Christopher Bale, so we can overlook these things.

Have a lovely Wednesday! Hang in there, almost weekend. :)

ironic post of the day

There’s a plastic bag ban in most shops in Hong Kong - if you need a plastic bag, you have to pay 60 cents. It’s definitely a good attempt to reduce plastic waste.

HOWEVER.

I recently watched a documentary on “reusable bags”. Since the ban has been implemented, many citizens have complained and in an effort to ease public rage, many shops now give out “reusable bags” upon purchase. Seems like a great solution. The problem though, is that in an average household, there is about 80 of these “reusable bags”. The sad thing is that these shops uses the most cost-effective bags which are made out of plastic pellets also - and the worst thing is that they are not durable enough to be used more than few times. So they break and people throw them away. Which defies the purpose of having a reusable bag, really.

So that’s my irony-of-the-day post for you all.

I know I’ve been a little MIA lately and that’s because I’ve been stuck at home either packing or studying, so I haven’t been out anywhere, nor have any interesting insights to share. (My plastic/resuable bag was inspired by my trip to the supermarket today HA).

badass

I stole half a loaf of bread. OOPS.

Here’s what happened…

It was around 9pm when I went to the supermarket to grab some breakfast food. I really wanted some wholegrain bread. And when I really want something, I refuse to buy anything else. Of course, being so late already, there was NOTHING left that I had wanted. There was white bread (EW) and there was some fake bread (i.e. Asian sweet milky stuff trying to pass as “bread”) and there was some fake wheat bread with the crust cut off. Seriously, that shit is wacky. Asian supermarkets can be delightful and scary all at the same time.

With my brows furrowed and a frown upon my face, I’m already getting very annoyed. “Why isn’t there any decent bread?? GAHHHHH?!!” And then I see this half loaf of bread sitting all lonely in the top shelf. I grab it. Ooh…feels so soft and already I can smell the mixed grains and the dark brown rye colour looks so beautiful! It’s just sitting in a sandwich bag and there’s no tag, no code, no nothing. I guess it’s from the bakery section….but it’s closed already since it’s late now. Hmm……what should I do?

Stick it into my BAG and WOOT! free bread.

I’m sucha badddass.. booyah!

I read somewhere that said Australians were the loosest most badass people in the world. I agree hands down.

Prometheus - the short version

Donut spaceship leaves behind tall Albino bodybuilder. He undresses and drinks a cup of goo. Goo kills him - Albino’s DNA deconstructed and then reconstructed to create new life, as in, us mortals. Why? Because he can.

Fast forward thousands and thousands of years we find Dr. Elizabeth Shaw and her life/science partner staring at some cave drawings. 

Shaw: Look, loverboy, look at that giant pointing to those circles. It’s exactly the same as every other cave drawing we’ve found ALL OVER THE WORLD. This is obviously an invitation to outer space to meet our creators.

Holloway: WOOOO!!!! I may act like an idiotic bogan but I’m really a smart scientist. I wanna meet my creators! WOOOOO!! But I’m also alcoholic. WOOOO!!!

Fast forward about 90 years and we are aboard a spaceship with it’s very own robot butler (David) who also happens to be very good looking. 

Shaw: I just woke up after sleeping for two years in a pod…PUUUUURRGFFFFFFF…

Holloway: WOOOOO!!! Baby we’re here! WOOOOOO!!

Captain: It’s Christmas, let’s deck the halls. [Whips Christmas tree out of his ass]

Fifield: Nobody talk to me because I only love money and rocks. And I’m going to die anyway, so who cares what I’m like.

Millburn: I’m a biologist and I took an oath before coming onboard that if I see weird alien creatures, I shall pet them no matter how dangerous they look.

That’s about all the crew (even though it said 17 crew…the rest aren’t important). Oh and not to forget, Vickers. She’s the ill-tempered adolescent who constantly yells out commands that nobody follows and whines about wanting to go home.

Vickers: Hey after sleeping for 2 years without knowing why, let’s all do a debriefing where I’ll finally explain to you why you’re on a spaceship.

There’s a hologram of Weyland with really bad aging make up and effects: Blah Blah.

Shaw: We’re here to meet our creators! It’s clearly an invitation, just look at the cave paintings!

Holloway: WOOOOO!!!

Fifield: So fuck evolution and Darwin?

Shaw: I choose to believe. Because I really can’t be bothered to think of a reason. 

Holloway: WOOOOO!!!!! 

They all suit up and of course, weapons are not allowed and then of course, Fifield and Millburn chicken out and of course, those two dickheads get lost. 

Oh and there’s also a German woman with unnecessary lines: The air here is somehow pure. It’s breathable.

Holloway: I’m taking this helmet off!

Shaw: No! You might get killed or de——

Holloway: WOOOOO!!! I did it already bitch.

David magically knows everything that humans don’t and he magically pushes some buttons and some holograms of elephant men are running away and they all die. 

Shaw: Let’s take elephant man’s head back.

David: Pushes more buttons.

Shaw: There’s black goo … everything is melting!

David: This is interesting. [steals a melting gooing urn back to lab]

Holloway: [walks around a mysterious green crystal] Should I WOOO? because I haven’t yet decided if this crystal is cool or not..

Captain: Y’all stupid idiots, there’s a storm coming and y’all better get back into the ship. Don’t trip or drop shit cos you will die.

Shaw: Ooops…my elephant head, I dropped it! I gotta run out into the storm to get it…

Holloway: Shit, my girlfriend is blown away.

David: [face palm] Now I shall calmly save you loser humans. Hold up.

Moments later back inside the lab in the spaceship…

Shaw and german lady: Let’s do science on the head!! Make it think it’s still alive.

[Insert probe and electrocute the shit out of it]

Elephant head: Fuck, what are you doing to me? Let me rest in peace! I died already! GAHHHH…..my head is exploding!! [Head explodes and green gooey shit is everywhere]

Shaw: Hm…what can we do next? Let’s take some DNA and match it with ours! [GASP] It is us. We are them…..

Holloway: Really? Yay but I’m drunk. I dunno, I drank something weird that David gave me. I think he put some black goo in it……oh shit. Oh well, let’s have sex!

Whilst everyone was having sex…

Millburn: Hey! There’s a snake with a vagina head swimming in the black goo. I was just about to go to bed but it’s so cute and I can’t help but pet it. Remember, I took an oath!

Fifield: Don’t touch that shit.

Millburn: It’s too late! It’s breaking my arm and squirming it’s way into my suit and OOps…it just went down my throat. [DIES]

Fifield: SHIT…I’m gonna save you man….but hesitantly. I shall try to cut it with my tiny nail filer. Oh shit, it’s blood is melting my helmet onto my face. [Kinda dies]

The following day….

Holloway: Oh shit there’s a worm in my eye! 

Shaw: Are you sick baby?

Holloway: I think I can walk it off.

Shaw: Okay, I believe you are fine even though you’re very pale and your eyes are a scary black and you have black veins popping out of your neck and you’re stumbling everywhere. I choose to believe.

Captain: Let’s go find those two idiots. Oh we found them…they’re dead.

Holloway: Erm guys, sorry to interrupt our momentary sadness, but I’m feeling kinda sick. Maybe carry me back to the ship please?

Meanwhile, Vickers is armed with a fire-torch at the gates of the ship and ready to kill any “contaminated shit”, i.e. Holloway.

Shaw: Please we can save him!

Holloway: Baby, I’m sick. Let her kill me. WOOOOO!!!! [Runs into fire]

Shaw collapses at the sight of her crispy boyfriend. The rest of the crew are thinking: Well three down. There’s still 14 to go. Now’s not the time to be sad. 

Moments later back on the ship….

David: Dr. Shaw are you awake? You feeling okay? Oh by the way, you’re pregnant. With an alien. You know, since you had sex with Holloway after I infected him with black goo.

Shaw: SHIT! It’s growing so quick…oh shit! This is just like Bella and Edward’s vampire baby!! 

[Beats up all scientists and runs to the surgery pod where she manually cuts out Shaw Jr. out of her uterus and casually staples it back together]

Shaw Jr.: MOMMY!!! Why did you take me out so early? Why don’t I look like you or any other alien babies? WHY AM I AN OCTOPUS??

Shaw: Fuck you kid. [Hits the decontaminate button and gasses the shit out of the octopus]

[So Shaw is running around and she stumbles across David washing the feet of none other but the supposedly dead Weyland!]

Weyland: Oh Dr. Shaw! How lovely it is to meet you! Your stapled abdomen and blood-covered body is looking rather fine!

Shaw: Thank you for asking. So why are we here? Those Albino bodybuilders weren’t what we thought they were! They wanted to kill us but somehow they all died in piles out there…

Weyland: Yes dear, but David found one who’s still alive inside a sleep pod. I’m going to ask him how I can live forever. And then he can kill you or whoever, I don’t really care.

Shaw: Fine, I’m coming with you. Even though you infected my lover and impregnated me with an octopus, I shall believe what you say. I choose to believe.

Meanwhile….

Captain: Hey look! There’s a mangled Fifield outside the ship! His legs are bent over backwards over his head! That shit looks legit. It must be him. Let’s go check it out.

Random dudes: Hey Captain, it is Fifield. He looks a little bit like a mutant ape creature but I think it’s safe to turn my back onto him while I just stand here and talk for a really long time. 

Fifield: RARRRRR [jumps up and kills a bunch of people before he himself is killed]

On the way out to find Albino…..

David: Oh I am a robot but I need the approval of Weyland. He created me, he’s my daddy. But if I get him killed, I shall be free.

Shaw: You’re messed up. Only humans can be this messed up.

Weyland: DAVID! Wake up that Albino! Ask him how I can live eternally!

Shaw: No! Ask him why? Why create and then kill us?

David: Sometimes, one must destroy in order to create. 

Giant Albino wakes up and tears David’s head out of his body and smashes the shit out of Weyland and the other unknown people. 

Shaw: Shit. I gotta run. My uterus may be stapled but it sure is holding up well. 

While the Giant Albino bodybuilder attempts to fly the donut spaceship to Earth and launch missiles of black goo onto it….

Shaw: CAPTAIN! Do you hear me? Albino is going to destroy earth! You gotta stop them! I’m trying to make my way back to the ship but it’s too late….

Captain: No problemo! I shall crash my spaceship into his even though it probably won’t do much damage and end up just killing my crew for no reason! 

Vickers: NOO…I want to go home! No, you take my orders! This is my ship! [Nobody listens so she scurries to get suited up and ejaculates herself out of the ship]

Shaw: Hey Vickers! You came out to keep me company? Aww how sweet! Oh shit….Captain’s spaceship exploded upon collision but it didn’t do any damage! Hey watch out! That huge donut spaceship is crashing down! Donut spaceship is still completely intact and it’s rolling towards us!!! RUNNN!!

Vickers: Every horror movie needs a dumb blonde chick who runs in a straight line and has to fall a couple of times. I shall be that person! [GETS CRUSHED BY DONUT SHIP AND DIES]

Meanwhile Shaw rolls to the right and out of danger. 

Shaw’s helmet: You have 2 minutes of oxygen left.

Shaw: Oh shit! Thank god there’s a capsule here. [Runs inside] Oh shit…my baby is all grown up and lashing to get out! What shall I do? 

David: Shaw! Do you hear me? Albino is out to get you! He seemed very angry….

Shaw: Oh shit. 

Albino: RARRRRRR…..

Shaw: TAKE THIS SHIT! [Presses button and unleashes her baby]

Shaw Jr.: Mommy, I shall make you proud! Let me use all my 10 teethy vaginas to suck the shit out of this Albino. 

Albino: I ain’t no easy Albino. I’m a body builder too! I shall resist! RARRRRRR

Shaw Jr.: Yea? Wait till you see my snake penis with a vagina head with teeth all over it and shove that down your throat! Take that! 

Shaw runs back out again with replenished oxygen and finds David.

David: I can help you.

Shaw: Even though you indirectly killed my man and gave me a weird octopus, I choose to believe you. BUT…we’re not going back to Earth. I wanna go to where those Albinos came from.

David: WHY?

Shaw: Because I need to have answers to my questions! Like why were there so many different types of aliens! Why did my baby look like an octopus? Why are YOU so handsome? Why did the Albinos create us and then try to kill us? What the hell is that black goo? Why did Holloway have a WORM in his eye? Why did Millburn try to play with the alien? How is it possible that I can run and fight right after a manual surgery I performed on myself with no anaesthetics?? WHY?!!!!

David: Okay. Let’s go. [Flies a second donut spaceship up into the sky and off into space]

Albino: I created you humans who then created more humans who then created an octopus who then created inside of me another alien….and it’s coming out!!!

Alien: [jumps out of Albino’s abdomen] RARRRRRRRRRRR

Alien’s second jaws: [extends out of Alien’s first jaws] RARRRRRRRRRRR

[The end]

what amazing clouds

Sitting in the study trying to study (the name of the room does not quite pinpoint what I actually use it for — should really rename it to something like “Procrastination Room”) and I’m just staring out the window watching airplanes land. What an awesome way to spend Friday afternoon.

As I look out, I marvel at the greatness of nature. I really wanted to write something touching and all, but this was what I saw: a phallic cloud. HAHA. Totally ruined my moment with nature, but I’m tired and I didn’t have coffee today. 

Happy Friday! Enjoy the long weekend (for some of you).

For me, I have a First Birthday to attend tomorrow. Shall update on that…a bunch of children in close proximity to me. Eek.

I'm not a jerk...it's a disorder!

Hello lovelies, I am sprawled on my bed thinking of all the mess in my house that I just cannot be bothered to clean. Why am I such a messy person? If you asked me what scares me the most, I would say “organizing and tidying”. I have no problem with cleaning, like vacuuming, washing, bleaching, sweeping, you name it. But I just CANNOT for the life of me pick up my clothes off the floor. Or my books from the floor. Or just about anything from the floor. Maybe I should try earn more money so I can buy a bigger house and have a “floor-drobe” instead. It’ll definitely make my life easier.

So I just came back from class and I cannot be bothered to study. *You’re getting the idea that I cannot be bothered about a lot of things…..and you’re right* We talked about personality disorders. Personality Disorders. Kind of a really harsh diagnosis, I think. There are always the people who are difficult and hard to get along with, and clinical psychologists would readily pop in some sort of a personality disorder. And the more I think about it, the more they are everywhere. Seriously, I can count about 5 people who I know with personality disorders (and I’m not counting those from my family haha jokes…). But I feel like it’s such a harsh term for someone who didn’t really get a chance… it’s like having a genetic illness. But just the word personality makes it seem as if the person is to be blamed. “Your personality is really awful and we’re going to make that a disorder, based on your personality." OUCH.

my imaginary tan

I went into 3 different drugstores looking for a self-tanner….and the result? I ended up buying sunscreen. How did that even happen??

1) There was not one self-tanner in sight. I tried to ask the saleslady but I had no idea what you call a sunless self-tanner in Chinese. I ended up asking awkwardly for something that “makes my skin darker?” She just looked at me weirdly. Then she said, “Maybe you should buy a sunscreen instead.” I walked out.

2) Went into two other different drugstores and set out to locate them myself. Just to avoid the awkward conversation of “but your pale skin is so nice” talk. Hey lady, I don’t need to convince you why I want to be tanned. So leave me be. Well, after walking up and down every aisle, I noticed that there was an entire aisle dedicated to whitening sunscreen. Yes, sunscreen that prevents you becoming tanned and makes you whiter at the same time. Wow. Technology has certainly advanced.

3) So I ended up picking up the bottle and reading more about it. And I then I thought to myself, “Is it bad that I never use sunscreen? Might I get skin cancer?” So I tried some on my hands. Smelled pretty bad. Picked up a different brand and squirted some onto my arms. OOOhhh….smells like apricot and coconut. I thought, “Well, if I can’t be tanned, at least I can smell tanned and summery…and just have an imaginary tan”

4) And then I bought it. SPF 50 PA++++ All that plusses and symbols just means that I ain’t getting tanned anytime soon.

5) Then I remembered why I gave up trying to be tanned a long time ago. It just ain’t happening, girl.

According to this chart, I would say I qualify for a Computer Programmer ;)

differing views..

I find it rather ironic that us women always point the finger at men objectifying us, and comparing us against unattainable standards of beauty. However, if you really think about it, women are way more harsher than men when it comes to appearances. Women are the ones who judge other women and comment on other women’s appearances. Most men probably don’t notice anything - unless you have some very distinguishing features.

This “epiphany” was sparked by a conversation I had with R. So I said, “I need to lose a bit of weight.” R said, “You don’t look fat. By the way, skinny doesn’t equal pretty.” I reply, “I know. I don’t want to be skinny. I should rephrase…I want to be firmer. Have a bit more muscles. You know, be stronger and firmer.” R says, “Well, there’s this misconception that most women have…that men like skinny girls. It’s actually not true. Skinny isn’t attractive.” Then I retorted, “Well, most women don’t try to lose weight for men. I think it’s more for themselves….and maybe other girls.” 

Then it hit me. Why do normal-sized women complain of wanting to lose weight? Are we doing it so our boyfriends/husbands/potentials will find us more attractive? Or are we doing it so we feel more attractive? Or is it so that we don’t feel as bad when we compare ourselves to other women? 

So my conclusion is that, women are way more harsher when it comes to looks than men are. Men are quite forgiving, in that they don’t feel as shocked when a girl isn’t wearing makeup. Think about it, isn’t it always a woman who asks you, “Are you feeling sick? You look a bit sick.” But of course, there are always the genuinely caring people who truly have good intentions. But for the rest of them, well, bitch…I’m just not wearing makeup. Haha.

Happy mid-week. You’re almost there…in the meantime, a silly joke for you.

Live like there's no tomorrow

"Live like there’s no tomorrow."

That’s one saying we’ve all heard before. The happy, carefree, adventurous and daring. That’s the image that usually comes with it.

But I think that those with no hope, no future, with nothing to look forward to, would also live like there’s no tomorrow. Because, for them, there really isn’t a tomorrow. 

That’s my pessimistic take on it. What do you think?

In other news, check out this song….. I blast this real loud and it helps drown out the crazy world that is the subway, although, it doesn’t help much with the summer body odours….(that’s where a nice menthol-scented pack of tissue comes in handy!)

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/v/Pn68nmNLOxM]

If I'd learnt anything at all...

Being a grad student in psychology means I read a lot of research papers. And this is why I almost always cringe when I see news articles and magazines talk about “new research” and “surprising findings”. I came across this new piece of research in many different articles but they all beamed the too-good-to-be-true title of : Regular Chocolate Eaters are Skinnier!! Yes, read that again, you read it right. This piece of “research” truly bothered me. So apparently, individuals who regularly eat chocolate had a lower BMI than their counterparts. Does that mean chocolate makes you skinny? NO.

If I’d learnt anything at all in grad school, it’s that correlation is not the same as causation. Just because two things happen to occur together, does not mean one caused the other. Say you farted and then it began to rain immediately. Did your fart cause the rain? Maybe, if you were some mythical Greek god. So there’s a correlation, but not exactly a causation.

And for goodness sake, we all know that BMI is a shitty measure of fat/skinny. People who exercise a lot have higher muscle mass and thus, higher BMI’s. Another person could be all fat and water but have a low BMI. So I call bullshit.

I just wished people would stop misleading public with their fancy titles. And why would some researcher even research about such a stupid topic anyway?

Duh dude 1: Dude….that girl in that chocolate ad is hot. I wonder why she’s not fat eating all that chocolate on TV…?
Duh dude 2: Dude…..you’re totally right! Why not do a research on that?
Cadbury chocolate company: Hey losers! We’ll totally sponsor you to conduct research that shows chocolate isn’t fattening so we can show it to the schools and so we don’t have to be banned and kids can keep on getting fatter! It’s a win-win situation!

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/v/m8dDTIlj-ZQ]

But, hey, at least you now have a legit-sounding reason to pig out ;)

Happy Almost-Friday :)

romantic comedies suck

Romantic comedies suck. Yes they do. Why? Because first of all, you never, NEVER, see a man look like this:

Who also happens to love cooking for you, lighting candles, cuddling you all the time, buy you flowers, loves small animals and small children, have empathy for the poor, love the environment, treats women with respect, have a decent career, watches the news, is intelligent, loves to cuddle (did I say that already?), loves to clean, notices when you change your hairstyle, opens the door for you, apologizes at the right time BLAH BLAH BLAH. And still be straight. And isn’t a psychopath who ends up murdering you.

So yes, romantic comedies suck.

Women, romantic comedies are the biggest scam since Shakespeare knew how to crap. So don’t fall for it. Or you will never love your man for the way he is. Your man, the one who never cleans, doesn’t cook, thinks instant noodles are real food, runs away at the when they hear “children”, makes fun of everyone, thinks cuddling are for the weak, opens the door for himself and doesn’t even notice when the door slams you in the face, oh and also thinks beer is water. Yes, that man. If you stopped watching chick flicks, you might love him more. Yes, this man:

Happy Sunday everyone! I hope you all had a great weekend *not* watching chick flicks!!

homework ban?

This morning, I shared an interesting research study with my student. I told him how an Australian researcher found that homework had little benefit to young children and was not related to school grades.

I asked, “Would you show this to your parents?”

He replies swiftly, “No, because they would not believe what I say. Even if I printed the article and gave it to them, they’ll just say we’re different from Westerners.”

HAHAHA! Classic Asian parents.

reunions are amazing

I know I’ve been a super lazy blogger lately (well, to be fair, I’ve been pretty lazy all-round lately).

This year, 2012, may be the end as some people believe. But for me, it’s been an AMAZING year of reunions and catching up with old friends.

I’ve met up with old friends back from Canberra — the city where I had lived when our family first moved to Australia (I was two years old!)

I’ve met up with old friends from Ghana — the country where I spent my primary school days!

I was able to go on a wonderful trip with my best friend from Adelaide (all ten days and we did not have a single fight! Go us!) I absolutely love that woman in a no-homo way.

This weekend I’ll be meeting up with an old friend from Ghana who’s now married with kids! WOW! And we used to have water balloon fights in the basketball court. WOW!

I’ve met up with awesome people who are from all over the world and miraculously went to South Korea to teach English like I did! Ha…talk about random! I would’ve never met so many weirdos otherwise (haha kidding…love you all!) And I got to catch up with them again after two years!

I’ll be meeting another Canberra-ian baby friend of mine in a couple of weeks…

It’s only been a quarter of the year and I’ve been able to meet up with friends who’ve gone on their ways onto other parts of the world (and so have I). I cannot tell you how grateful and fortunate I feel right now!

MAN, I LOVE MY LIFE!

I find it absolutely amazing how all these people come in your life where, it all seems pretty random and coincidental, but at the same time, it also seems so right. And I’m so thankful to meet everyone I come across! You’re all awesome.

I dislike the current education system!!

This man says exactly what I feel, but a million times better and more convincing than I will ever be. I seriously dislike our current education system, especially the one in Hong Kong. Kids here all look somewhat to zombies, with dark eye circles and legs skinnier than a chopstick. They are not creative, not buzzing like children should be.

PARENTS….or would-be parents, WATCH THIS! And think about how we are ridding our kids of creativity and curiosity in learning.

a lil' something from youtube

One of my favourite things to do is go on YouTube and somehow, every time, I end up being linked to weird interesting videos. Here’s one by MrPoniator - who, “pony-fies everything”. He’s a pretty funny and cool animator!

Enjoy!

nonsignificance can be a big deal

So I come home and switch on the TV and the set-top box. Normally, I don’t really care what’s on. I just like to have a bit of noise around the house. I sit down with my tea and idly gaze at the picture box. Apparently the politician who is running for executive chairperson of Hong Kong had multiple affairs and there is a rumour going around that he has a son from a hushed relationship. Blah blah. I’ve been hearing about this for months now. When will it end? His wife is being interviewed and she says that she never forced her man to come home but he does each time, and that, is true love. Yada yada. I reach for the remote control and change the channel. Except nothing happens. I press the button again. And again. And again. And I smack the controller a few times. And press again. All to no avail. With my brows furrowed together in annoyance, still forced to listen to the wife talk about how her cheating husband is a great man and will be a great leader, I heave myself up and walk over to the set top box. Hey….. what the. There are no buttons to change the channel!! How is that? On. Off. That’s it?

So I go back to whacking my controller and then something more intelligent, i.e. changing the batteries. Still nothing. So I whack some more. And I curse the controller. Yes, and you thought only crazy people in hospitals talked to objects. Apparently, so do I.

Then I smirk to myself because I just thought of an ingenious idea. I flip open my laptop and type in Google: What to do when your remote controller breaks. *cue Vin Diesel’s smirk from Fast and the Furious yeaaaaaa* and hit Search.

What?! Nothing???? ALMIGHTY GOOGLE HAS NO ANSWER FOR ME? Not even a Yahoo answer?

…………………………………….
So I guess I’m forever stuck with this gay gay channel. Noooo……..

Who would’ve thought, something as insignificant as a remote controller could ruin my day, and potentially, my quality of life!!

So damn true. 

silence is golden

Twirling the drink in my hand, I smile and nod knowingly as she talks. I take a sip of my drink to distract me because what I really want to do instead is to grab her shoulders and shake her and scream in her face, “CAN’T YOU SEE? WHY CAN’T YOU SEE? IT’S RIGHT THERE….JUST…FRIGGIN’….LOOK….WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID??!?”

But the nicer and kinder me (yes, there is a kind person in me…however small she is lol) knows that my opinions and my views do not matter here. Who am I to say what is best for her? Would I not be acting self-righteously if I imposed my solution onto her?

So the best thing to do is to listen, and not give any advice. What I can do is help her sort out her options without telling her what to do. To explore with her what she really wants and what is stopping her.

Sometimes, the more you learn, the more you grow, the more you realize that silence is golden.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/v/pyj2qL-bQ4E]

how i miss thee

Going to the supermarket took me about 20 minutes today. Supposedly it is a 2 minute walk. But before I could walk out, I had to pull on a sweater over my long-sleeved teeshirt. Put on a jacket. Wrap a big scarf. Pull on tights. Put on my uggs. Bring an umbrella. Grab a shopping bag. I was tired before I was even out the door.

I do not like to use the word hate because it is such a strong word. But I do mightily dislike the cold weather.

EW.

When will the day come where I can wear shorts and my Havaianas?

At least I feel happier looking at this picture :) I miss wearing you!!!!

there's still some shock lingering on

On the third day of the Lunar New Year, I had some time to kill so I headed to a mall. Little did I know that I would encounter what would probably be the most horrible thing to ever be witnessed. Am I being overly dramatic? Well you can decide after you read my accurate report of exactly what happened. This post is not based loosely on a true story but it is indeed a true real life experience that happened to yours truly (and a bunch of other innocent victims).

So here goes:

Skip to the best part and I’m lining up for the bathroom. In Hong Kong, it is common practice to linger around for 15 minutes before you enter a stall. No, I’m kidding. The harsh reality is that you cannot ever pee without having to line up for 15 minutes. NOWHERE. Unless the toilet in your own home. But then again, people here live with such large families that you probably have a waiting line also.

Anyways, back to my story.

So I’m waiting in line trying to hold my breath (yes for 15 minutes) and this lady rushes in and totally ignores all lining-up-ers. I’m fourth in line and the ladies before me tell that woman to go line up. She (the one who tried to cut the line) held up a white square packet which looked like a sanitary pad and said, “Oh I need to change my pad!” And then the ladies in front of me said, ‘Well, you should still line up…we all need the toilet too.” And then what the lady said next shocked me and I think I will remember her words till the day I die.

She said…

”Oh I don’t need the toilet. I can just stand in the corner and change my pad.”


At that point my eyes were so wide my eyeballs could have dropped out. And I abruptly turned my head around the other side. Before I could regain consciousness, I believe I had uttered, “Oh Goodness…trust the people from the strong nation to do such a thing” (because that lady spoke mandarin and was presumably from mainland China — aka the Strong Nation).

Then something even more unfortunate happened.

The toilets in Hong Kong are rather small and when I turned my head around I was faced with a wall of MIRRORS where the basins and taps were. Oh GOD. And I saw that lady. Changing. Her. Sanitary. PAD. Fuck that shit. I had nowhere to look and so I literally stared into the lady who was lining next to me. We both exchanged looks of horror. I said “Sorry, I don’t know where to look….so I’m just going to look at you.”

it was pretty much like this…

AND THEN THE WORST OF THE WORST HAPPENED. (You’re probably thinking, yeah right, what could be worse??)


That I’m-just-gonna-pull-my-panties-down-and-unhygienically-freak-everyone-out-by-putting-my-bloody-vajayjay-on-show lady just walked out like nothing had happened. AND I SWEAR THERE WAS NO WATER SOUND. She did not wash her hands.

Oh my goodness.

Just writing about this makes me shiver….talk about re-traumatizing. But I doubt anyone has witnessed such craziness that I must report it. And if you’re reading this and realize that you’ve changed pads in public, I strongly suggest you do so in the privacy of a bathroom with closed doors.

Just imagine if she was using a tampon instead. OMFG.

I hope you all had a more normal Chinese New Year.