Friday...blah

Today, I had my first Korean lesson with my teacher, Juri. She volunteered to teach me (unpaid) and I was surprised at how serious she was!! She had a textbook and vocabulary book and she told me that I’ll be tested each week so I’ll have to do homework! But I’m really glad because I feel like I will be learning quite a bit! So far, I’ve only managed to learn half the korean alphabet hehe, but I will be there soon~~ ㅋㅋㅋ
I’ve also found a bible study group~ and an ALL ENGLISH SERVICE wow!! went last week, and I like it very much. It’s short and sweet~ and there are many nice ppl that i’ve met! (except for one creeper) hahah~~ better not say too much =X maybe he might stumble across my blog and think…..hey, that sounds like me! haha! but all in all, i like that church, its called Dong-Sang church (so u can look up the website if ur really that bored!)

Today’s friday and I very much want to go out clubbing or drinking…or just anything that is considered social. Hehe…the other night, I went out to a University festival and saw a performance by Dynamic Duo, a popular Korean hip hop group, they were pretty cool! And then also tried chinese wine & went karaoke…and had chicken n beer…..but i still feel like i need to do something fun tonight because its friday!!

BUT…

I’ve got a church thing tomorrow morning at 10:30am..So if I head out to Seoul tonight…I don’t think I could make it back by the last train..and I definitely do not want to come back in the morning!

ahh…… what to do? Alcohol or Church? HAHAHA! such a horrible question to even ask!

plain and simple is best...or is it really?

Personally, I love magharita pizzas..good cheese and tomato is the best combination ever. My love affair with pizzas started with a Magharita. I remember being in Ghana, when they didn’t have much foods (not even McDonalds’), and when a pizza place opened up, it was like heaven for us. Even though it was just cheese and tomato, I felt like that was all I ever wanted. But when was the last time I had a magharita pizza? Not because I’m weight conscious or healthy..no.

Each time I walk into a pizza place, I’m bombarded with a million choices. Mega BBQ Chicken, Fantastic Meat Lovers, Super Supreme, Sensational Seafood…not to mention Bulgogi Pizza now that I’m here..woah..with such fancy names, who would even look at the boring old magharita?

Apart from getting distracted by fancy names, I also get side-tracked by the prices. Hey, I’d like to get my money’s worth! I always look at which one is the best valued…I mean, if I can get seafood for only 3 dollars extra…why not?

Somehow, it dawned on me that I do the same in almost every aspect of my life. I started off with a choice..I knew what I had wanted. Yet along the way, I got distracted and ended up going for something else. When I am faced with so many choices, so many options..I am clouded by things that are “new and improved”, or things that are popular or in demand.

And all the while, I’ve forgotten that what I had wanted was a simple cheese and tomato pizza.

It’s the same case when it comes to men. I never wanted much. Just somebody who liked me and I liked him. Simple, right? Yet somehow, along they way, I lost track of that. I see what other people have, and I want that. I watch a movie and I want more romantic things. I hear about problems and I get scared. I begin wanting more time. I get annoyed if he doesn’t call. I get upset if he hangs out with his friends. I became needy. What happened to the free-spirited girl I used to be?

Somehow, I forgot how a simple cheese and tomato pizza was so satisifying and so delicious and that was all I had wanted. I forgot.

Have you ever been on a train for 40 minutes only to realize you're still in the same stop?

How hard is it to catch the subway? Apparently its much harder than we ever dreamt of.

Had a great start to the “early” weekend, ie. Friday, with a shopping trip to Myeong Dong at 9 am (its one hour away!)..we get there by 10ish and start our long-deprived shopping spree……i must say, it’s definitely one of the best shopping places around in Seoul.

When it was time to go home (because we had to work dammit!), me n a co-worker hopped onto the subway heading towards Oido. I swear we got on the right train, going the right direction. We didn’t have to transfer or anything, so we in the train we sat, chatting away…(like women do).

Then, Kandre gives out a little squel and when I look up, WHAT? WTF?? We were in Myeong Dong…..AGAIN? But… but we had been sitting on the train for the last 40 minutes. And I swear it was moving. (And I swear I’m not on drugs!) Only this time, the train was going in the wrong direction. (And Line 4 is definitely NOT a circle…..)

So we quickly run off and stare, confused and a bit disoriented, at the map. Okay….so what happened? Why are we still in the same station after 40-friggin-minutes?

Anyways, we had to catch a taxi and made it just in the nick of time. I had to run home to change into work clothes and wore sneakers just so I could run (literally) to work (and then change back into heels hehe~)

What a start to a weekend!! I mean, it was a bit of a bummer experience, but hey, at least we did our shopping…..and had lunch at Craze-Burgers (yumm!!) and today, for the first time, I really appreciate the ways taxi drivers drive like there is no tomorrow.

My Answer to your Annoying Question..WHY?

Dropping everything and going to a foreign country may have been the best thing I have done. If it wasn’t for all the annoying questions people fire at me. “Why?” It drives me nuts. Three simple letters, yet it could possibly be the most difficult question in life. “Why?”

Maybe because I don’t know why. Or maybe because I’m running away from reality. Or maybe I went temporarily insane and jumped on a plane fueled by adrenaline. Or maybe I’m just not content with a “real-world” job and settling down and get neck-high in debt with a mortgage….

So to tell you all, Why did I come to Korea of all places? I guess it was just fate. Luck, accidental, God’s will…however you wish to put it. I didn’t intentionally choose Korea. All that mattered was, I wanted to be somewhere. Away from what the world that I knew. I wanted to see new things. Try different things. I wanted to step out of my comfort zone. I wanted to live my life in a whole new way. And I guess that’s exactly what I’m doing here.

However, there are many people who don’t seem to understand. They tell me, ”You’re just wasting your time. You’re going to come back a year later and be a year behind everyone. You’re going to have to start from scratch again.”

Maybe they’re right. But what if that’s not what I’m after in life? I muse to myself, why would I want to get a house, get a boring 9-5 job now, when I have the rest of my life to be doing exactly just that? Hey, if I achieve everything that society deems “successful” all before I’m 30….what the hell am I supposed to do with the remainder of my life? I guess I’d be good to die by 31?! I’m truly enjoying myself right now, and I don’t see the need to burden myself with mortgages and a fat bum from sitting too much. I’m old enough to be independent, yet I’m still young enough to not have to deal with committments and responsibilities.

So why am I here? I guess I’m just enjoying my life (the way we should!)

Why me? ... Why not you?

Yesterday, went out to Kyobo, maybe the largest book store in Seoul. I was quite impressed with it…but in no way did it compare to the one in Taiwan…their English section was not bad, but not as good as I would’ve liked! However, even so, I spent quite a while in there..if it was any bigger, I would’ve gladly made myself a campsite right there.

Read 1/2 of a book there, titled How to Love. I know, sounds cheesy, but hey, it brought up some very interesting notions. It’s by a psychiatrist, or I guess, a marriage therapist. It wasn’t exactly on dating problems as such nor did it say things like “If he doesn’t call you, he doesn’t love you” in it. What I found very intriguing was that it all seems so plain and obvious, yet we somehow all miss it.

It made me think why we humans are so self-absorbed and so self-awarding..why is it that when good things happen (whether it was our efforts or pure luck), we are quick to attribute that to ourselves. And when bad things happen…we try to blame everyone but ourselves and wade around in self-pity crying “Why me?” Well…it may sound brutal, but why not you?

If good things happen by chance, then inevitably bad things will happen too. So why do we have this expectation that we should get the good things, and someone else should get the bad? I think it’s the same for relationships/marriages. Throughout the course of life, I think everyone’s probably seen more failed or failing or unsuccessful marriages than loving, respecting ones…so why do we think it should be that we will be the ones with a fairytale ending?

It can be fair to say that no-one expects their spouse to look the way they did in their wedding photos 10 years later. Then why do we expect the rest to not change? People change; our surroundings, life-events and so on all contribute to shaping who we are. Our core personality stays stable but things do change. We change ourselves, but yet we cry “You were never like this before”.  Well, sadly but true, you never used to look this this before either. So can you be blamed?

I think the root of failure, is that, unrealistic expectations. I don’t mean to say that we should not expect happy endings. What I mean is, the expectation of a fairytale blinds us, and even though the other person is blatantly wrong for us, we are so caught up in chasing our dreams that we forget the present. We forget to see. Somehow, we think love can change a person for the better. Maybe. But wouldn’t it be better if we started out with someone who was actually right for us, than trying to change someone who wasn’t? Nobody’s perfect, that we all know. But I don’t think we should have the mindset to change someone. Rather, I would prefer to grow together.

As I was reading that book, a phrase stuck with me.

It said “Don’t blame the mirror for your reflection”.