The Dungeon Gates of Thailand

Rewind back to about a month ago, when I went to Thailand with N. 

We decided to go to a museum on sunny day. We even took a motorcycle taxi to get there - it was N’s fabulous idea and I was so frightened that I gripped the driver so hard that he slowed to a near-crawl and turned his head around to ask me “okay?”; which actually scared me even more because he was looking at me and not the road ahead. Anyways, we got there and somehow we couldn’t leave the way we entered. We had to take a boat down the stream. Okay, he guy informed us that it will be a private boat ride and it will be cheap and we can take photos because he will go slowly. Okay, we get in. Okay, the guy who talked to us didn’t get in. Okay, the boat is moving and a random man is taking us down the stream.

OUR PRIVATE BOAT

It is all well and good and we enjoy the scenery — there wasn’t too much because it was a narrow stream with really polluted water. And then we come to a stop, about 30 minutes into our private boat ride. There’s a gate in front of us which slowly opened up — kind of like a dungeon gate almost. Our boat goes in and then the other gate doesn’t open but the gate behind us closes. 

Our driver stops the engine. All is quiet. We are in this trapped section of the river. All is fine until we look up and see men carrying rifles walking near the gates. Then we look the our left and see a Thai man talking on the phone whilst taking pictures of us. We turn around and the driver solemnly looks at us. 

Oh my god. What is going on? Why is that man taking pictures of us and smiling creepily at us? Why are those men carrying rifles? Why couldn’t we leave the museum the way we entered? Why did we have to get on a boat? Why is there no one here except us? 

I could not help but think — IS THIS SOME KIND OF HUMAN TRAFFICKING?! ARE WE GONNA BE PROSTITUTES?!? AM I GONNA HAVE TO ENTERTAIN SICK WESTERN MEN?!

But it was all just a figment of my imagination because before long, the gates opened up and the rifle men bid us farewell and we went along happily down the river. 

THE END.

PS. I sent out postcards from Thailand but apparently nobody received anything. Damn you Thailand. I loved you but you scammed me! Was it all a lie — that post office?? Was it all a lie?!