We usually will offer comfort to someone in distress. I guess especially so when we’re in a pleasant mood. I can give you the time of my day and a shoulder to cry on. I can listen empathetically and feel for your difficult situation. Does that make me a true friend? A good friend, maybe. But a true friend who really does love you? I’m not sure. I can feel for you. But in the same way, I also feel for the perfect guy who gets dumped by the love of his life in almost every Hollywood chick flick. Am I a friend of this imaginary character? Well, I hope not.
So it occurred to me, quite recently actually, that the test of love isn’t when tragedy takes place. Rather, it’s when something especially fortunate happens to, not you, but your friend. This is the time when we feel jealous, envy, and sometimes even dark thoughts such as I can’t believe she/he is so lucky!! creep in behind our forced smiles and laughter.
When someone is feeling sad, we don’t feel jealous of their situation. In reverse, we may feel more fortunate about ourselves. And then, when we offer solace and comfort to the needed, we feel good about ourselves too. But what about when someone you know is having it really good? Do you feel happy for them? Or is it a fake happy? I think that is how we know who we really do love and care about. When you feel completely happy for that person. Then that’s when you truly care about their welfare, and not just in our own interest. Unless there is a conflict of interests…..but that’s for another story another time.
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