Bad things usually comes in three’s. So it’s almost like a 3 course meal of shit. First you got your appetizer, then your main and then you wash it all down with a big plate of dessert. Except it isn’t as wonderful as it sounds and it really sucks that you have to sit through plate after plate of shit. But sometimes, even a 3-course meal of shit doesn’t cut it.
And that’s when life gives you a whole friggin’ buffet of shit. There are millions of shit everywhere and you just don’t even know where to start. As if that weren’t bad enough, there are always those eager-eyed waiters who take away your plate before you’re even done and you’re left to go get another plateful of shit. And it repeats. Until the people around you seem satisfied and ready to leave. That’s when you can breathe a sigh of relief and can say goodbye to all that shit.
Wait, no, it doesn’t end yet. You go home feeling so full and bloated and those feelings hang around for days on end. You might get constipated, or maybe get diarrhea. You might even gain 3 pounds. And you’re probably going to be really gassy for a couple days. You just gotta wait it out until all those nasty side effects subside.
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