The upside of having a million people around you at all times

Hong Kong has a population of seven million people. And a land mass of just 426 square miles. Which is rather shocking, if you ask me. But as everyone always complain of how tightly packed and squishy it is here (I am guilty - I hate people crowded places), I decided to brighten up my day and also yours by letting you know the upside of having a million people around you AT ALL TIMES.

1. You can be as aggressive as you want and push anyone you want just to get somewhere. And if that person turns around and gives you a stare like “Hey, watch it, don’t push”, you can just put on the same disgusted expression and look to your left, making it seem like that innocent man in the square glasses pushed you both. Aww….. isn’t that something?

2. There’s just about so many people that there’s always someone uglier than you. So you can walk around town with no makeup, a T-shirt with holes in it, and unwashed hair and feel absolutely normal, if not a little pretty.

3. You always, ALWAYS must wait at least half an hour before you can even get into a decent restaurant. However, they say that anticipation is almost better than the real thing and all this waiting makes the meal just that much more delicious (even if it’s your own brain playing tricks on you to solve your cognitive dissonance).

4. People watching is way better in a super densely populated place. If you just stood still for 10 minutes (which NOBODY in Hong Kong would EVER do that - because everyone is in a rush to … I have no idea where) you would see unthinkable things happening right before your eyes. You would see high schoolers in uniform making out (or even having sex under the street lamp if it’s Christmas eve). You would see 60 year old ladies dressed in outfits that would only be legal on a toddler. You would see men, MEN, in jeans tighter than Pamela Anderson’s clothes and hair gelled more aggressive than Elvis Presley’s. You would also probably see a Chinese tourist mother holding out her son over the corner of the street peeing, yes PEEING…INTO A BOTTLE. Well, you’d see a lot more but that’s just some stuff I’ve seen.

So there you go. Four awesome reasons why you should cheer amongst the crowds right this minute. Everyone, enjoy the first week of the year!